Porkules

Review by Calanthe

So Autolycus "sold" Artemis' bow to Discord. Now, I wonder how she paid him. There's a challenge for you fanfic bards out there! But seriously, our goddess has this bow and she has a plan to cheer up Ares (the poor chap still depressed because Strife got killed (Armageddon Now). Her plan: to turn Hercules into a pig. Iolaus and Autolycus try to rescue Hercules by stealing Hermes' sandles, and despite making a great team they bicker every step of the way. In the meantime, Herc makes friends with a pig called "Katherine" (!) and nearly gets turned into bacon.

Discord, meanwhile is busy on the second part of her plan. As she tells Ares, she might not be able to kill Hercules (Zeus' decree still protects him) but it will be easy for someone else to…and she knows just the man: a hunter she's been — er, shall we say "romancing"? Ares likes her plan, but is somewhat jealous of her pet hunter. This isn't too surprising: the hints about their bedroom antics are frankly hilarious:

Discord: There's something I want you to do for me. …It involves a pig.

Hunter (misunderstanding): I'll try anything once.

Unfortunately for this episode, the plot required Hercules to survive. I would have loved to see the barbeque! Ares more-or-less spoils the plan himself, killing Discord's hunter just before Hercules and friends turn up to rescue Katherine. That is, just at the point when the hunter could actually have been of some help. But this ep is basically a slapstick comedy, and he's just a redshirt (Translation for non-Trekkies: disposable character killed before the end of the show). Discord is furious with Ares, but before she gets the chance to fully express her displeasure Iolaus turns her into a chicken. The chicken is wearing a miniature of Discord's costume, and doesn't look happy.

There's a lot of potential in this episode. Somehow, I think Discord will want revenge for the chicken thing, and it's a real shame they never followed up on that (no, in One Fowl Day it was Ares). A fun story which could have done without Auto and Iolaus taking up screen time.